But realistically, my night hadn't even started. This was all just a tune-up for my adventure to Somerville and pure PPV bliss. The back story looks like this – the Charlie Horse in Bridgewater used to host WWE PPVs until they moved the prices up in $5 increments. I don't know if there is a personal issue involved, or if they just don't think wrestling will fill the place up anymore, I ‘m not sure. But my favorite sports pub (and the site of many many free birthday meals) hasn't shown a WWE PPV in years. They sure do host a mean UFC bash though.
THE 20th ANNUAL ROYAL RUMBLE SPECTACULAR
So it's off to Somerville, just north of the Bean. There, another arcade sports pub greets us just off route 93. $5 tickets will gain you access to a live showing of MSD's ALL-TIME favorite PPV, the 20th annual ROYAL RUMBLE showdown (and a few small bars stocked with buffalo wings and hard liquor). This shall be the site for all future WWE PPV gatherings by yours truly. Instead of cajoling some nitwit into ordering PPVs for me, I'll spend that $40 or $50 on tequila shots and appetizer combos. All in the presence of a hundred other raving wrestling maniacs. This is where my story gets interesting, as we take you in a drunken fog to Somerville Massachusetts and my birthday night comes to a spectacular conclusion.
The rules are simple, you pick the winners in each opening match and you get three picks from the ROYAL RUMBLE litter (perfect for 10 or less players). I swear to God on all that is holy and sacred, the Undertaker was among my three picks. As birthday boy I got to pick first, and he was my choice. I also selected Shawn Michaels and Sabu. The reason I picked them was simple – WWE told me to. Watching Undertaker clean house at the SMACKDOWN mini-Rumble last Friday (a match he wasn't even formally invited into) made him my early favorite. Especially after they re showed that finish during the RUMLE pre-game rundown. I picked HBK as my second pick (after such perennial all-stars as Edge, Randy Orton and Carlito were picked ahead of him) because I started to visualize a DX versus John Cena showdown for WRESTLEMANIA. Plus the 10th anniversary of his RUMBLE win and the fact it was shown in his hometown of San Antonio. Sabu was just my sleeper favorite (and the Sandman was already taken). The very early matches of the card are still fuzzy. I know (but still don't fully understand) the Hardy Boyz getting a ridiculous reaction from the fans, including the ones packed in to the viewing room. I missed the end of that match and the entire Lashley/Test match because I was on a drink run. I do know I heard the place explode when the Hardy's won, but the entire ECW Title match was oddly quiet.
The Batista/Kennedy match was short, it feels like. As soon as I was finally settling in, the match was over. One of my friends (who popped in during the night) couldn't even understand how a man who looks like Mr. Kennedy would earn offensive against Batista (keeping in mind he is NO fan of the sport). Just one non-fans casual observation. Hometown hero John Cena (representing West Newbury MA, even though it's practically in New Hampshire) got the livest reaction all night. Muthaphuckkers absolutely love this guy. There were a few Umaga fans who made up for their absence with sheer volume, but overall this place was Chain Gang central. Sickest match of the night, and so entertaining. Umaga is a great performer and a very believable character, and John Cena is John Cena. The scene where he pitched the metal stairs over the top rope into Umaga's face was an ill visual. Umaga's dramatic run down the two announce tables for a missed splash through the third one was chilling in the crowd reaction it drew. Priceless adrenaline rush and I felt privileged to share it with so many other drunken lunatics.
There are other quick blurs. Ric Flair! WHOOO! When he was backstage dancing under the strobe light. Lil Bastard got all the little kids riled up when he bit Johnathan Coachman. Kelly Kelly is hot but "big balls" jokes are passé. The road to WRESTLEMANIA has begun, but "All Grown Up" sounds like a lame theme.
The RUMBLE itself was superb as always. What were the time intervals on this one? Cuz it felt like dudes were coming out on top of each other. We'll take it to the head Sunday Morning Hangover-style and let my mind spray. Random bullets from the 20th annual ROYAL RUMBLE:
• Needed Ric Flair number one so we could set the event off in pompous fashion and get the entire building to scream "whoooo!"
• Big boos when Flair finally got tossed by Edge (with a minor assist by Kenny Doane or "Dykstra"). But when Kenny got tossed by Edge from behind after mocking the Flair strut, the place popped huge.
• The Great KHALI was a HUGE addition to the RUMBLE. His late entrance alone had the place going crazy, never mind when he started throwing people out left and right. This only made Undertaker's eventual arrival even bigger. When KHALI finally hit the floor (after a nearly botched clothesline attempt) the place exploded with cheers.
• I didn't see King Booker get eliminated. I saw him pitch out Kane and then follow him outside to pummel him further, but no actual elimination. Must have missed that somehow.
• Sandman got a huge pop when he arrived and when he laced into those fools with his kendo stick. But the ECW extremist got the Bushwacker Luke treatment and was eliminated right away. That got a huge pop too, out of sheer excitement and shock.
• When Sabu came down the first thing he did was unload a table at ringside. The first thing I did was ask "who's gonna be the guy to put him through it?" The unanimous answer was Kane and I'm pretty sure that's exactly what happened.
• The teased friction between Rated RKO went over HUGE with the crowd. Edge streaked towards Orton from behind with what appeared to be a spear. But Orton held him off with a threat from his steel chair. When HBK managed to eliminate both members by himself (after they throttled Undertaker) it was pure wrestling nirvana.
• Could be the countless "Red Deaths" my friend insisted we fill up on, but the final showdown between HBK and the Undertaker was the best finish to a ROYAL RUMBLE match EVER. Awesome ending that kept both competitors looking strong. I didn't even remember until AFTER the match that Undertaker still has his revered WRESTLEMANIA undefeated streak intact! This just made his WRESTLEMANIA main event even more exciting for me. I can't wait to see how this one unfolds. I'm hoping he gets the Trish Stratus treatment, cuz I don't see anyone on the roster worthy enough of ending that streak. It should last forever.
• Just to end the night on an absolutely perfect moment – and to illustrate the epitome of birthday miracles – I present to you this true story. While waiting for wifey to come out the bathroom, I wobbly punched in 50 cents to play one of those claw games. Keep in mind I was drunk as fuck and could barely stand. But I won on my first try, and earned wifey a little stuffed teddy bear that read "GOOD TIMES EMPORIUM" – the place of our adventure. Later that night on the way home, we stopped at Burger King off the Route 24 highway and I earned highest score EVER on THE SOPRANOS pinball game. I made it all the way to "Boss"! I almost wouldn't believe it myself, if I hadn't woken up this morning to see that little bear smiling back at me. God bless the world. I didn't even wake up with a hangover.
OUTROI haven't been checkin the scene so much lately, but I remember when an internet smark was only known for his cynicism. To them I say "you either ain't smoked out enough, or you're not watching the show in its proper environment". The only way to see or feel the product is to see it live, or at least see it with a crowd. And to me, there's no better place than at GOOD TIMES EMPORIUM in Somerville MA. You ain't truly experiencing a wrestling PPV without movie screen projectors and concert sound systems. And the roar of the crowd. For what it was worth, this was the best overall ROYAL RUMBLE I've seen in a long time. And I owe it all to the GOOD TIMES EMPORIUM, one of the few places still ill enough to host WWE PPVs. God bless their little lime wedges.
MSD
BONUS
Five biggest pops of the night
1) The Hardy Boyz beat MnM
2) The entire John Cena/Umaga match, but especially when Umaga was FU'd onto the steel steps and the first time Cena locked him in the STFU with the ring rope.
3) Finlay finally gets eliminated.
4) The Undertaker's first appearance (after the Great KHALI set the scene with his path of destruction).
5) The climatic finish as Shawn Michaels hit the ground and Taker went on to ROYAL RUMBLE immortality.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
WWE Classics on Demand (Psychos, Sickos, Maniacs & Monsters)
You're running, your pace is picking up
Your face is dripping blood - I'm coming
You're screaming - nobody hears you like you're dreaming
The scalpel is right behind you, ready to slice you uneven…
* Necro - "Scalpel"
I've been reading Apter mags since Brand Nubian said "Slow Down". They treated the wrestling game with a sincerity and a seriousness that belied its carny roots (while still maintaining - perhaps even fashioning - these same archaic codes). When Apter himself slid out of the shadows in the late 90's with his own "smart" books (like the now-defunct but revolutionary W.O.W. World of Wrestling series – of which I have the whole set!), I went right along with the ride. Honestly, I didn't even realize wrestling had "smart" sites on the net until Apter directed me there with ads for the old wrestleline.com. In the years since, we've all got a lot smarter. Even as mainstream publications like Pro Wrestling Illustrated have quietly gone shoot, they still manage to find that right blend of mark and smart. I look back at old issues now (from the early 80's) and marvel at how nuggets of territorial truth find their way into their subjective fiction. These articles and stories have always been exciting, unique and downright entertaining. Much like the content we get for free everyday here at 411Mania.
Anybody that knows the history of our internet culture knows 411Mania was born out of our nerdish love for pro wrestling. All the great stuff you used to have wait a month for at the newsstands is now available at the click of a finger – fresh every 24 hours. That's a lot of content, and a ton of unique perspectives. Hell even the pro authors have daily journals and online blogs. So how does one go about finding some elbow space in an already standing-room only crowd? By coming with that next big thing. That one idea you can pass down to your familia for generations to come. So - much like I jumpstarted MMA coverage here at 411Mania, I'm back to spearhead another initiative. Yes, it's true it's true. While the 411Mania site for MMA only has archives that stretch back to 9-23-06, I assure I was there first. Here's the proof. Welcome to the Sunday Morning Hangover. Remixed. We continue to blaze new trails.
THE SUNDAY MORNING HANGOVER
Inaugural Edition
Psychos, Sickos, Maniacs & Monsters
They're almost as annoying as Jillian Hall's singing voice. Almost as bad (and damn near unavoidable) as the "Don't Try This At Home" vignettes before every WWE DVD release. I'm talking about the ads for WWE On Demand. They promise you can "Relive" some of the greatest moments in all of wrestling history, at your own convenience and control. Sounds remarkable, amazing even. Sounds like every fans fantasy, and it was widely regarded as such just a few short years ago. So it's like a dream come true now every time we watch these WWE On Demand commercials. But does the concept live up to its hype? Will it fulfill every fans wishes, or go up in smoke like the WCW invasion angle? Sip this mimosa and puff a roach, cuz there's only one way to find. Pull up a chair now as The Sunday Morning Hangover continues.
It's October 2007, and Hallows Eve quickly approaches. In honor of our pagan national holiday, WWE On Demand is offering a "Shorties" section dedicated to the "Psychos, Sickos, Maniacs and Monsters" of pro wrestling. Really helps you get into the killing spirit, with a cast and crew of goons that make Michael Myers look like the Tooth Fairy. Seconding that emotion is the demented Snitsky who lovingly hosts this mornings festivities.
Abdullah the Butcher versus Bruiser Brody
Steel Cage Match
WCCW
10/12/86
Rated TV14 V. Snitsky opens in a black and white vignette by announcing "let the fun begin". Cut to action. Abdullah the Butcher and Bruiser Brody start out trapped in the cage as the official introduction begin. Abdullah looks absolutely horrifying with a black executioners mask draped over his head while pacing his corner hungrily. Manager Gary Hart seconds him, and tries to keep the Mad Man from the Sudan under control. Tonight he's billed at 481 pounds. In the other corner, Bruiser Brody stalks his side of the ring and is announced at an even 300 pounds. Crowd cheers lustily. Finally, "after a world wide search" Fritz von Erich is announced as the special referee for this main event. The steel cage is the old school mesh kind, like the stuff found around prison yards or slaughter houses.
Fritz Von Erich aggressively searches Abdullah for foreign items (in a cage match?) as Gary Hart keeps his charge in command. Von Erich dispels Hart from the ring and calls for the bell. The two mat madmen, Brody and Abdullah, circle as Hart finds his way to ringside. Lockup and they grapple for position along the ropes and cage. Brody into the corner and Von Erich calls for a break. He has to physically force the two apart. He imposes his rules and authority over them with a stern lecture.
The two fighters lock up again - close up on their straining faces. Abdullah whips Brody into the buckles and follows with a massive avalanche. Brody is instantly deflated. He's caught in the corner and Abdullah ambushes him with chops and slaps. Brody staggers around the ring. Abdullah drags him to the ropes and pulls Brody's long hair around the middle strands. Brody is down and Abdullah goes to work with a strange kind of face pull submission, but Brody flops into pinning position and Abdullah doesn't comply. Instead he gets to his feet to showboat, before dropping massive elbow across Brody's chest piece. Crowd is scared silent. Again he moves into position, but Brody drags himself to his feet and boots Abdullah in his massive gut as he charges. They exchange hard shots toe to toe, and Brody drives his meaty opponent back into the turnbuckles where unleashes barrage of stiff kicks to the face that look totally uninhibited and wild. Abdullah bleeds hard way from the permanent lacerations on his forehead (but somewhere in there you can see a quick swipe with a razor blade). Into the cage Brody drags his foes head across the steel and pounds him down to one knee. Outside Hart yells directions to his charge.
Three times Brody propels himself off the ropes with a running boot into Abdullah's head. But on the 4th charge the Butcher catches him with a retaliatory kick and just like that, the madman from the Sudan is back in control They brawl wildly across the cage, and Abdullah winds up with his beefy paws in the back of Brody's knotty hair, raking his face across the fence. Gurgling madly, with that trance-like stare of dense bloodlust that is his trademark, Abdullah continues his mutilation even as Von Erich warns him to break. Abdullah does break and stares daggers through the special ref. Abdullah hits two head butts but Brody seems unfazed. He comes back with some punches and suddenly both men are on their knees trading hard blows. Brody starts hitting some hard, unanswered shots coupled with double axe handle blows to Abdullah's exposed face and skull. The crowd cheers each successive hit but Brody can't seem to drop the massive butcher. Abdullah wobbles, and finally hits the mat – eliciting a round of cheers from the crowd.
Brody scales the turnbuckles, much to the crowds excitement. He's all the way to the top, using the cage for balance. Seeing the massive Brody scaling the top turnbuckle really puts this small ring size in perspective. It's much smaller than a standard WWE ring. Brody comes off the top with a forearm to the center of Abdullah's crimson forehead, stunning him indefinitely. The butcher stares into space with a vacant look in his eyes, before collapsing to both knees. In response, Brody bounds off the ropes again and deliver another crushing boot to the butchers brain cavity. This shot finally drops the bloody Abdullah.
Crowd reaction shot, lots of white people. Dudes with trucker hats and chicks with frizzy ‘80s mops. Gary Hart slips something through the mesh into Abdullah's waiting hands, and it immediately reinvigorates him. Brody comes into the picture and Abdullah jabs him with the unseen object. "He had something… in his hand!" exclaims the color commentator. Von Erich comes over to investigate, but Abdullah stashes it in his tights and jabs the special ref in the throat for hanging all over his back. Von Erich staggers across to the to the other turnbuckles, clutching his throat. It's a fork or something, and Abdullah violently stabs Brody in the forehead. Only a couple of inches lower and…. well, you know. Before the Butcher can strike again, Von Erich catches his hand and expels the object from the ring. Crowd is loving Von Erich's handling of the situation. Abdullah confronts Von Erich who suddenly springs into action, pummeling the Butcher with stiff punches. The barrage is so deadly that it drops Abdullah like a 500 pound bag of wet concrete. Von Erich then directs the groggy Bruiser over for the pin and counts the three. Bruiser Brody wins (with help from the special referee). Travesty!
Gary Hart rushes the ring to appeal the decision. Abdullah wipes the blood from his forehead and tries to gather himself as Brody escapes the ring. Gary is face to face with Fritz pointing and yammering. But Von Erich is giving it right back. Abdullah sneaks in with a shot to the back of Fritz head, but big daddy Von Erich no sells it. Instead, he grabs Gary Hart by the coat and flings him into the Butcher. Abdullah charges the elderly man but eats a boot to the gut. Von Erich then stabs the Butcher in the head with his own fork! He grabs Hart and does the same to him! The butcher and Von Erich grapple as security (who look like dudes from the audience) enter the ring and separate the parties. Von Erich's shirt is stained with Abdullah's blood.
Snitsky signs off by whispering "My pleasure is pain. See you soon". More nightmares to come.
*** BONUS MATERIAL!!! ***
Army of Darkness
Championship Wrestling
Florida
1986
Rated TV 14 V. Snitsky is back with the same black and white filmography, clutching two dangling chains. "Sometimes I have no explanation for my actions... You think a man like Kevin Sullivan ever did? No remorse. Feel the pain…" Sick grin.
Cut to Gordie Solie live in the CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING interview booth, introducing Kevin Sullivan and his Army of Darkness. He has Roddy Piper face paint from WRESTLEMANIA VI (Half black/half white) and a black hooded cloak with dark purple lining covering his head. Behind him stalk some of his brood, and suddenly you see where Raven got his idea for the Flock. There's Luna Vachon lurking in the background! With the same blond Mohawk and colored veins along her temples! Sullivan throws back his hood to speak, and even beneath the thin layer of makeup you can see a roadmap of scar tissue on his forehead. "Darkness has laid a long time in the moons. Evil has laid dormant for a looooong time…" he intones.
He gives esoteric, arcane quotes with all the fervor of a roadside preacher. He promises his enemies the Road Warriors (who are teaming with Blackjack Mulligan and Wahoo McDaniel) that "all hell will break loose". But his biggest target is Superstar Graham, who has just split from Sullivan's brainwashed camp. "Just when you thought it was safe to come to Florida, my heart has turned back to darkness"… the madman from Boston growls. All the while, the crowd jeers and mocks him.
Cut to action. Bob Roop tosses his unnamed jobber opponent in 6 man tag action, as he his Army of Darkness cohorts (Purple Haze and leader Kevin Sullivan are just demolishing their overmatched opponents. Roop drags a jobber named Backlund over the top rope before pitching him across the ring and through the ropes hard to the outside. There, Purple Haze muscles him into a gorilla press and tosses him back INTO the ring where Kevin Sullivan is waiting. He pulls Backlund to his feet and punches him back down. He plays to the crowd before pulling Backlund back to his feet and smashing his head into an oncoming Bob Roop forearm. Roop wears some kind of weird half-face paint, Purple Haze wears none. Roop holds the nearly deceased jobber in place for Purple Haze to enter the ring and crush him with a Khali hand chop. Backlund is down and Haze once again pitches him through the ropes and outside the ring.
Haze follows his opponent out and takes him to the metal chairs before gripping and tearing at his face. Backlund rolls in and gets stomped by Sullivan. Roop pitches him back into his own corner with a hair pull where Backlund wisely tags out. But his partner gets swallowed as soon as he enters the ring by the black-vested Bob Roop who propels him into the opposite corner where Kevin Sullivan awaits. More hard chops from Roop. Sullivan begs for the tag and gets it. Chops the jobber to the mat multiple times. As Sullivan utilizes another quick tag (nobody has been in the ring longer than 30 seconds at any time) the poor jobber uses this time to tag his own partner. But Roop meets them in their corner and chops him down too. Jobber #2 quickly tags out and Backlund reenters. Roop Irish whips him off the ropes and decapitates him with a powerful lariat. Backlunds body careens 360 degrees from the force, before crashing lifelessly to the mat. Roop easily covers him for the pin.
Back to the Solie interview – Sullivan says the real Billy Graham died in that desert. Now all that's left is for the vultures to do their job. More devilish, arcane gibberish. Weird and freaky stuff.
Stay tuned next week for more WWE 24/7 On Demand, as THE SUNDAY MORNING HANGOVER continues to refresh wrestling fans across the globe!
peace!
MSD
Your face is dripping blood - I'm coming
You're screaming - nobody hears you like you're dreaming
The scalpel is right behind you, ready to slice you uneven…
* Necro - "Scalpel"
I've been reading Apter mags since Brand Nubian said "Slow Down". They treated the wrestling game with a sincerity and a seriousness that belied its carny roots (while still maintaining - perhaps even fashioning - these same archaic codes). When Apter himself slid out of the shadows in the late 90's with his own "smart" books (like the now-defunct but revolutionary W.O.W. World of Wrestling series – of which I have the whole set!), I went right along with the ride. Honestly, I didn't even realize wrestling had "smart" sites on the net until Apter directed me there with ads for the old wrestleline.com. In the years since, we've all got a lot smarter. Even as mainstream publications like Pro Wrestling Illustrated have quietly gone shoot, they still manage to find that right blend of mark and smart. I look back at old issues now (from the early 80's) and marvel at how nuggets of territorial truth find their way into their subjective fiction. These articles and stories have always been exciting, unique and downright entertaining. Much like the content we get for free everyday here at 411Mania.
Anybody that knows the history of our internet culture knows 411Mania was born out of our nerdish love for pro wrestling. All the great stuff you used to have wait a month for at the newsstands is now available at the click of a finger – fresh every 24 hours. That's a lot of content, and a ton of unique perspectives. Hell even the pro authors have daily journals and online blogs. So how does one go about finding some elbow space in an already standing-room only crowd? By coming with that next big thing. That one idea you can pass down to your familia for generations to come. So - much like I jumpstarted MMA coverage here at 411Mania, I'm back to spearhead another initiative. Yes, it's true it's true. While the 411Mania site for MMA only has archives that stretch back to 9-23-06, I assure I was there first. Here's the proof. Welcome to the Sunday Morning Hangover. Remixed. We continue to blaze new trails.
THE SUNDAY MORNING HANGOVER
Inaugural Edition
Psychos, Sickos, Maniacs & Monsters
They're almost as annoying as Jillian Hall's singing voice. Almost as bad (and damn near unavoidable) as the "Don't Try This At Home" vignettes before every WWE DVD release. I'm talking about the ads for WWE On Demand. They promise you can "Relive" some of the greatest moments in all of wrestling history, at your own convenience and control. Sounds remarkable, amazing even. Sounds like every fans fantasy, and it was widely regarded as such just a few short years ago. So it's like a dream come true now every time we watch these WWE On Demand commercials. But does the concept live up to its hype? Will it fulfill every fans wishes, or go up in smoke like the WCW invasion angle? Sip this mimosa and puff a roach, cuz there's only one way to find. Pull up a chair now as The Sunday Morning Hangover continues.
It's October 2007, and Hallows Eve quickly approaches. In honor of our pagan national holiday, WWE On Demand is offering a "Shorties" section dedicated to the "Psychos, Sickos, Maniacs and Monsters" of pro wrestling. Really helps you get into the killing spirit, with a cast and crew of goons that make Michael Myers look like the Tooth Fairy. Seconding that emotion is the demented Snitsky who lovingly hosts this mornings festivities.
Abdullah the Butcher versus Bruiser Brody
Steel Cage Match
WCCW
10/12/86
Rated TV14 V. Snitsky opens in a black and white vignette by announcing "let the fun begin". Cut to action. Abdullah the Butcher and Bruiser Brody start out trapped in the cage as the official introduction begin. Abdullah looks absolutely horrifying with a black executioners mask draped over his head while pacing his corner hungrily. Manager Gary Hart seconds him, and tries to keep the Mad Man from the Sudan under control. Tonight he's billed at 481 pounds. In the other corner, Bruiser Brody stalks his side of the ring and is announced at an even 300 pounds. Crowd cheers lustily. Finally, "after a world wide search" Fritz von Erich is announced as the special referee for this main event. The steel cage is the old school mesh kind, like the stuff found around prison yards or slaughter houses.
Fritz Von Erich aggressively searches Abdullah for foreign items (in a cage match?) as Gary Hart keeps his charge in command. Von Erich dispels Hart from the ring and calls for the bell. The two mat madmen, Brody and Abdullah, circle as Hart finds his way to ringside. Lockup and they grapple for position along the ropes and cage. Brody into the corner and Von Erich calls for a break. He has to physically force the two apart. He imposes his rules and authority over them with a stern lecture.
The two fighters lock up again - close up on their straining faces. Abdullah whips Brody into the buckles and follows with a massive avalanche. Brody is instantly deflated. He's caught in the corner and Abdullah ambushes him with chops and slaps. Brody staggers around the ring. Abdullah drags him to the ropes and pulls Brody's long hair around the middle strands. Brody is down and Abdullah goes to work with a strange kind of face pull submission, but Brody flops into pinning position and Abdullah doesn't comply. Instead he gets to his feet to showboat, before dropping massive elbow across Brody's chest piece. Crowd is scared silent. Again he moves into position, but Brody drags himself to his feet and boots Abdullah in his massive gut as he charges. They exchange hard shots toe to toe, and Brody drives his meaty opponent back into the turnbuckles where unleashes barrage of stiff kicks to the face that look totally uninhibited and wild. Abdullah bleeds hard way from the permanent lacerations on his forehead (but somewhere in there you can see a quick swipe with a razor blade). Into the cage Brody drags his foes head across the steel and pounds him down to one knee. Outside Hart yells directions to his charge.
Three times Brody propels himself off the ropes with a running boot into Abdullah's head. But on the 4th charge the Butcher catches him with a retaliatory kick and just like that, the madman from the Sudan is back in control They brawl wildly across the cage, and Abdullah winds up with his beefy paws in the back of Brody's knotty hair, raking his face across the fence. Gurgling madly, with that trance-like stare of dense bloodlust that is his trademark, Abdullah continues his mutilation even as Von Erich warns him to break. Abdullah does break and stares daggers through the special ref. Abdullah hits two head butts but Brody seems unfazed. He comes back with some punches and suddenly both men are on their knees trading hard blows. Brody starts hitting some hard, unanswered shots coupled with double axe handle blows to Abdullah's exposed face and skull. The crowd cheers each successive hit but Brody can't seem to drop the massive butcher. Abdullah wobbles, and finally hits the mat – eliciting a round of cheers from the crowd.
Brody scales the turnbuckles, much to the crowds excitement. He's all the way to the top, using the cage for balance. Seeing the massive Brody scaling the top turnbuckle really puts this small ring size in perspective. It's much smaller than a standard WWE ring. Brody comes off the top with a forearm to the center of Abdullah's crimson forehead, stunning him indefinitely. The butcher stares into space with a vacant look in his eyes, before collapsing to both knees. In response, Brody bounds off the ropes again and deliver another crushing boot to the butchers brain cavity. This shot finally drops the bloody Abdullah.
Crowd reaction shot, lots of white people. Dudes with trucker hats and chicks with frizzy ‘80s mops. Gary Hart slips something through the mesh into Abdullah's waiting hands, and it immediately reinvigorates him. Brody comes into the picture and Abdullah jabs him with the unseen object. "He had something… in his hand!" exclaims the color commentator. Von Erich comes over to investigate, but Abdullah stashes it in his tights and jabs the special ref in the throat for hanging all over his back. Von Erich staggers across to the to the other turnbuckles, clutching his throat. It's a fork or something, and Abdullah violently stabs Brody in the forehead. Only a couple of inches lower and…. well, you know. Before the Butcher can strike again, Von Erich catches his hand and expels the object from the ring. Crowd is loving Von Erich's handling of the situation. Abdullah confronts Von Erich who suddenly springs into action, pummeling the Butcher with stiff punches. The barrage is so deadly that it drops Abdullah like a 500 pound bag of wet concrete. Von Erich then directs the groggy Bruiser over for the pin and counts the three. Bruiser Brody wins (with help from the special referee). Travesty!
Gary Hart rushes the ring to appeal the decision. Abdullah wipes the blood from his forehead and tries to gather himself as Brody escapes the ring. Gary is face to face with Fritz pointing and yammering. But Von Erich is giving it right back. Abdullah sneaks in with a shot to the back of Fritz head, but big daddy Von Erich no sells it. Instead, he grabs Gary Hart by the coat and flings him into the Butcher. Abdullah charges the elderly man but eats a boot to the gut. Von Erich then stabs the Butcher in the head with his own fork! He grabs Hart and does the same to him! The butcher and Von Erich grapple as security (who look like dudes from the audience) enter the ring and separate the parties. Von Erich's shirt is stained with Abdullah's blood.
Snitsky signs off by whispering "My pleasure is pain. See you soon". More nightmares to come.
*** BONUS MATERIAL!!! ***
Army of Darkness
Championship Wrestling
Florida
1986
Rated TV 14 V. Snitsky is back with the same black and white filmography, clutching two dangling chains. "Sometimes I have no explanation for my actions... You think a man like Kevin Sullivan ever did? No remorse. Feel the pain…" Sick grin.
Cut to Gordie Solie live in the CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING interview booth, introducing Kevin Sullivan and his Army of Darkness. He has Roddy Piper face paint from WRESTLEMANIA VI (Half black/half white) and a black hooded cloak with dark purple lining covering his head. Behind him stalk some of his brood, and suddenly you see where Raven got his idea for the Flock. There's Luna Vachon lurking in the background! With the same blond Mohawk and colored veins along her temples! Sullivan throws back his hood to speak, and even beneath the thin layer of makeup you can see a roadmap of scar tissue on his forehead. "Darkness has laid a long time in the moons. Evil has laid dormant for a looooong time…" he intones.
He gives esoteric, arcane quotes with all the fervor of a roadside preacher. He promises his enemies the Road Warriors (who are teaming with Blackjack Mulligan and Wahoo McDaniel) that "all hell will break loose". But his biggest target is Superstar Graham, who has just split from Sullivan's brainwashed camp. "Just when you thought it was safe to come to Florida, my heart has turned back to darkness"… the madman from Boston growls. All the while, the crowd jeers and mocks him.
Cut to action. Bob Roop tosses his unnamed jobber opponent in 6 man tag action, as he his Army of Darkness cohorts (Purple Haze and leader Kevin Sullivan are just demolishing their overmatched opponents. Roop drags a jobber named Backlund over the top rope before pitching him across the ring and through the ropes hard to the outside. There, Purple Haze muscles him into a gorilla press and tosses him back INTO the ring where Kevin Sullivan is waiting. He pulls Backlund to his feet and punches him back down. He plays to the crowd before pulling Backlund back to his feet and smashing his head into an oncoming Bob Roop forearm. Roop wears some kind of weird half-face paint, Purple Haze wears none. Roop holds the nearly deceased jobber in place for Purple Haze to enter the ring and crush him with a Khali hand chop. Backlund is down and Haze once again pitches him through the ropes and outside the ring.
Haze follows his opponent out and takes him to the metal chairs before gripping and tearing at his face. Backlund rolls in and gets stomped by Sullivan. Roop pitches him back into his own corner with a hair pull where Backlund wisely tags out. But his partner gets swallowed as soon as he enters the ring by the black-vested Bob Roop who propels him into the opposite corner where Kevin Sullivan awaits. More hard chops from Roop. Sullivan begs for the tag and gets it. Chops the jobber to the mat multiple times. As Sullivan utilizes another quick tag (nobody has been in the ring longer than 30 seconds at any time) the poor jobber uses this time to tag his own partner. But Roop meets them in their corner and chops him down too. Jobber #2 quickly tags out and Backlund reenters. Roop Irish whips him off the ropes and decapitates him with a powerful lariat. Backlunds body careens 360 degrees from the force, before crashing lifelessly to the mat. Roop easily covers him for the pin.
Back to the Solie interview – Sullivan says the real Billy Graham died in that desert. Now all that's left is for the vultures to do their job. More devilish, arcane gibberish. Weird and freaky stuff.
Stay tuned next week for more WWE 24/7 On Demand, as THE SUNDAY MORNING HANGOVER continues to refresh wrestling fans across the globe!
peace!
MSD
WWE Classics on Demand (Violent Tendencies)
Violent Tendencies are highlighted this time around from WWE 24/7!
"Shroomz? Yeah that's some other shit.
One of the reasons why George Clinton sees the mothership"
* Xzibit - "Shroomz"
Regular WWE Magazine readers stand up. Ever since the WWE re-launched their publication with a MAXIM bent, they've started printings factual inaccuracies covertly within their pages. They're usually given as answers to their trivia questions, and are portrayed as such to get the maximum amount of input from their "smart fans". The only ones nerdy and meticulous enough to note such small gaffes. Either that, or the new editors and writing staff are too dumb to really do the research. Such is the case with the following example:
Last week I ran a recap of a Bruiser Brody match from 1986. The date listed was 10-12-1986, nearly three months after Brody was killed in Puerto Rico! Andrew Prentice notices this little gaffe and brought it to my attention. All I can think is that maybe this was just the airdate, not the actual live date of the card. Either that or the researchers at WWE 24/7 are too high to do their homework! I'm leaning towards the latter, especially on this occasion. One thing led to another this weekend, and now I'm all alone coming down off a two day shroom bender.
I'm just slightly weirded out, clinging to my familiar purple haze to bring me back to earth. So bear with me if the language goes slightly askew, it's hard to focus on the colored computer screen. Thank God for spell check. But I made deadline!
TERRY FUNK
April 1979
Black-n-white shot of Snitsky's back tattoo. He turns to face the camera with his rotten teeth, and proclaims "my name is Snitsky. I have no idea who I'm gonna hurt next. Just like no one knew who the Funks were gonna harm next… know what I mean?..." sadistic chuckle
Terry Funk sits in the center of the interview table, flanked by his brother Dory and a guy wearing a loud aqua marine jacket with wide lapels. Funk cuts a steely eyed promo, never breaking eye contact with the main camera. He will bring the pain to Dusty Rhodes.
Cut to video excerpts as the three way dialogue between the funk Brothers and commentator continues. Terry's in his corner of the ring during introductions. With a thick white bandage on his forehead, he's seconded by his brother Dory. Crowd responds voraciously. Cut to action. Lock up with the Dream. Big Dust comes quickly into the match with a series of bionic elbows, followed by his big wiggle jabs. Funk on commentary calls it a "lucky left" that caught him, as his body ricocheted off the mat with the last punch. Now we get to the meat of Terry's objections. His voice grows heated and more agitated as we watch Dusty Rhodes irish whip Funk off the ropes and floor him with a cast-coated back elbow. Dusty continues to use the foreign object to his advantage as he drops a fat elbow across the sternum, and then another one on Funks knee. He plays to the crowd like Ric Flair holding the leg, before sequencing into a spinning toe hold – Terry's own move! Crowd roars their approval.
All the while, Funk on overdub commentary is complaining about Dusty's use of his cast. "It's the cast hurting me, not the toe hold!" So of course it's perfectly rational to see big brother Dory rush into action with the assist, as Funk continues to give his narration. Hard kicks from Dory's cowboy boots split Dusty's forehead like a watermelon, allowing Terry to gouge and tear at the cast and weak arm. Big Dust is damn near unconscious, and bleeding uncontrollably. Terry continues to pulverize the stripped arm with vicious knee drops and strikes, all to the crowds roaring disdain. Suddenly, Reggie Parks and bunch of Dusty's other "little idiots" (as Terry calls them on commentary) rush to ring and attempt to break up the massacre. But the two brothers fight them off black ninja style, and nearly clear the ring. But the sheer number of jobbers is overwhelming, and somehow Dusty is dragged out of the ring to safety. Wild brawl continues to ensue in the ring, as the commentary gravely discuss Dusty's arm injury on overdub. Terry Funk promises "it will be over quicker than you know".
Cut back to the live interview. Terry is incredulous when asked if he thinks Dusty will make him pay for the assault. "Seek revenge on me? He better bring a whole lot more of himself!" Dory chimes in with some ominous death threats of his own, all shaded beneath the brim of his giant cowboy hat. Wrap that up, Snitsky signs us off, and we're out.
***BONUS FOOTAGE***
Bruiser Brody & the Missing Link versus Terry Gordy & the Great Kabuki
WCCW
May 6, 1986
Close up of Snitsky's knuckles wrapped in chains. Cut to facial close up. "Does it make me a bad person that when I hurt people I feel no regret? Do you think any of these four felt sorrow for what they did? I don't think so!"
Cut to action. Madd people in the ring, including some camera man and extras (cut to jerky camera angle from within the stampeding ring). Wild brawl between all participants breaks out. Bruiser Brody tackles the massive Gordy and pitches him through the ropes and outside the ring while Link and Kabuki brawl in the center. Bruiser drags him out into the crowd a bit, and current WWE staples such as steel barricades are noticeably absent. Here, the cozy (yet boisterous and blood thirsty) fans are only separated from the wrestlers by a few thin strands of string. Brody and Gordy easily brush through those as they take their fisticuffs on the road and up the various aisles. Crowd loves it. Brody stalks Gordy around the ringside area where he eats a punch and Gordy is in control (albeit shortly). Brody quickly goes into the no sell and answers with an eye rake. In the ring, Kabuki has fought off Missing Link and stands unopposed. Focus on Brody and Gordy, who continue their brawl outside the ring.
They brawl in and around the shoddy string partitions and suddenly the bell rings to signify the official beginning of the match. Undeterred by the madness unfolding around him, the ring announcer calmly recites the complete match rules and introductions. By the time he gets to weight classes, Kabuki is killing the Missing Link in the center of the ring with a dangerous Oriental nerve pinch. Brody and Gordy are out of the picture as the crowd focuses their chants on the struggling Missing Link. He tries to fight to his feet, with the crowd chanting his name. But it's to no avail, the nerve pinch is too disabling. Suddenly he fights back with a toe-stomp! Kabuki releases the hold and grasps his foot like a THREE STOOGES flick. Both wrestlers stagger briefly, before Link eats a thrust kick from the aging Kabuki. The evil and mysterious ninja plays to the crowd, with exaggerated hand gesture signaling the return of his deadly nerve pinch! Once again he clamps its paralyzing effect upon the shoulder and neck area of the Missing Link. Looks like a flabby old man with long hair and cheap face paint clamping a rest hold on a swollen, fungus-colored caveman with weird poofy hair.
Time for crowd shots as the mostly teenage audience cheers "Go Link go!" Kabuki releases the hold to showboat, but eats a plunging Link headbutt to the gut. Link is still dazed, and looks toward his fans for energy. Again he unloads with a falling head thrust into Kabuki's gut that's reminiscent of a "brontosaurus attack" (so says the commentator). The Missing Link is back in control, the crowd firmly behind him. He clasps Kabuki by his long hair and drives him face first into the top turnbuckle. Kabuki is down and the Link stands on his chest with both feet, using the ropes for added leverage. Crowd loves it. Missing Link moves off his opponent to study Kabuki's cornerman Michael Hayes actions at ringside. Hayes keeps the green-faced goon distracted long enough for Kabuki to rile the crowd up with more exaggerated gestures for the death pinch. But Link catches him in time and floors him again. To keep the Kabuki down, Link scales the ropes and delivers a diving forearm. Crowd roars it's approval.
Audience is hot now, and Link rewards their participation with… a giant bear hug! Kabuki performs a wildly exaggerated eye rake to escape. Both men writhe on the mat in pain, and Link checks his eyes to make sure they're still there. Hayes gives Kabuki some ringside advice, and the beaten old man drags himself to his feet to continue the attack. With his shoddy face paint melting off beneath hot arena lights, Kabuki takes Link down with a low spinning heel kick. Suddenly, the house announcers voice comes over the airwaves again. He says Bruiser Brody and Terry Gordy brawled out of the building and will not be returning. Crowd noises roise as Kabuki stands on the second rope strands and pounces onto Link with a FLYING variation of his always deadly nerve pinch.
Ref is checking. Shots of the ringside managers to fill time. Link is still dying on the mat, flopping like a fish out of water. His legs convulse wildly, allowing him to fight back to both knees – then both feet. He musters enough strength to propel Kabuki face first into the buckles again, stunning the Asian warrior. One more brontosaurus attack from Missing Link, and Kabuki is on the mat in pain. Hayes sees his charge down, and springs into action. He slides Kabuki a set of nun chucks, an illegal action the audience clearly sees (but the ref doesn't). Kabuki bides his time as the crowd goes bonkers, trying to alert the ref to the bad guys dubious actions. Nunchuck to the gut of an oncoming Missing Link! Another blow to the back, and the green-hued madman is on the mat struggling to breathe. Now Kabuki goes back into his nerve hold, only with a slight variation – clutching Link around the throat like a choke hold. "Something new and different!" screams the ringside commentator. A chair gets tossed into the ring and winds up in Links hands. He uses it to bang his OWN head the intimidation factor alone drive Kabuki out of the ring, where he flees with Michael Hayes. Announcer calls it a win for Link via DQ and we're done.
"My pleasure is people's pain". I'm done bombing on these other writers. We be like shroomz shits – clearing the whole house out. One.
"Shroomz? Yeah that's some other shit.
One of the reasons why George Clinton sees the mothership"
* Xzibit - "Shroomz"
Regular WWE Magazine readers stand up. Ever since the WWE re-launched their publication with a MAXIM bent, they've started printings factual inaccuracies covertly within their pages. They're usually given as answers to their trivia questions, and are portrayed as such to get the maximum amount of input from their "smart fans". The only ones nerdy and meticulous enough to note such small gaffes. Either that, or the new editors and writing staff are too dumb to really do the research. Such is the case with the following example:
Last week I ran a recap of a Bruiser Brody match from 1986. The date listed was 10-12-1986, nearly three months after Brody was killed in Puerto Rico! Andrew Prentice notices this little gaffe and brought it to my attention. All I can think is that maybe this was just the airdate, not the actual live date of the card. Either that or the researchers at WWE 24/7 are too high to do their homework! I'm leaning towards the latter, especially on this occasion. One thing led to another this weekend, and now I'm all alone coming down off a two day shroom bender.
I'm just slightly weirded out, clinging to my familiar purple haze to bring me back to earth. So bear with me if the language goes slightly askew, it's hard to focus on the colored computer screen. Thank God for spell check. But I made deadline!
TERRY FUNK
April 1979
Black-n-white shot of Snitsky's back tattoo. He turns to face the camera with his rotten teeth, and proclaims "my name is Snitsky. I have no idea who I'm gonna hurt next. Just like no one knew who the Funks were gonna harm next… know what I mean?..." sadistic chuckle
Terry Funk sits in the center of the interview table, flanked by his brother Dory and a guy wearing a loud aqua marine jacket with wide lapels. Funk cuts a steely eyed promo, never breaking eye contact with the main camera. He will bring the pain to Dusty Rhodes.
Cut to video excerpts as the three way dialogue between the funk Brothers and commentator continues. Terry's in his corner of the ring during introductions. With a thick white bandage on his forehead, he's seconded by his brother Dory. Crowd responds voraciously. Cut to action. Lock up with the Dream. Big Dust comes quickly into the match with a series of bionic elbows, followed by his big wiggle jabs. Funk on commentary calls it a "lucky left" that caught him, as his body ricocheted off the mat with the last punch. Now we get to the meat of Terry's objections. His voice grows heated and more agitated as we watch Dusty Rhodes irish whip Funk off the ropes and floor him with a cast-coated back elbow. Dusty continues to use the foreign object to his advantage as he drops a fat elbow across the sternum, and then another one on Funks knee. He plays to the crowd like Ric Flair holding the leg, before sequencing into a spinning toe hold – Terry's own move! Crowd roars their approval.
All the while, Funk on overdub commentary is complaining about Dusty's use of his cast. "It's the cast hurting me, not the toe hold!" So of course it's perfectly rational to see big brother Dory rush into action with the assist, as Funk continues to give his narration. Hard kicks from Dory's cowboy boots split Dusty's forehead like a watermelon, allowing Terry to gouge and tear at the cast and weak arm. Big Dust is damn near unconscious, and bleeding uncontrollably. Terry continues to pulverize the stripped arm with vicious knee drops and strikes, all to the crowds roaring disdain. Suddenly, Reggie Parks and bunch of Dusty's other "little idiots" (as Terry calls them on commentary) rush to ring and attempt to break up the massacre. But the two brothers fight them off black ninja style, and nearly clear the ring. But the sheer number of jobbers is overwhelming, and somehow Dusty is dragged out of the ring to safety. Wild brawl continues to ensue in the ring, as the commentary gravely discuss Dusty's arm injury on overdub. Terry Funk promises "it will be over quicker than you know".
Cut back to the live interview. Terry is incredulous when asked if he thinks Dusty will make him pay for the assault. "Seek revenge on me? He better bring a whole lot more of himself!" Dory chimes in with some ominous death threats of his own, all shaded beneath the brim of his giant cowboy hat. Wrap that up, Snitsky signs us off, and we're out.
***BONUS FOOTAGE***
Bruiser Brody & the Missing Link versus Terry Gordy & the Great Kabuki
WCCW
May 6, 1986
Close up of Snitsky's knuckles wrapped in chains. Cut to facial close up. "Does it make me a bad person that when I hurt people I feel no regret? Do you think any of these four felt sorrow for what they did? I don't think so!"
Cut to action. Madd people in the ring, including some camera man and extras (cut to jerky camera angle from within the stampeding ring). Wild brawl between all participants breaks out. Bruiser Brody tackles the massive Gordy and pitches him through the ropes and outside the ring while Link and Kabuki brawl in the center. Bruiser drags him out into the crowd a bit, and current WWE staples such as steel barricades are noticeably absent. Here, the cozy (yet boisterous and blood thirsty) fans are only separated from the wrestlers by a few thin strands of string. Brody and Gordy easily brush through those as they take their fisticuffs on the road and up the various aisles. Crowd loves it. Brody stalks Gordy around the ringside area where he eats a punch and Gordy is in control (albeit shortly). Brody quickly goes into the no sell and answers with an eye rake. In the ring, Kabuki has fought off Missing Link and stands unopposed. Focus on Brody and Gordy, who continue their brawl outside the ring.
They brawl in and around the shoddy string partitions and suddenly the bell rings to signify the official beginning of the match. Undeterred by the madness unfolding around him, the ring announcer calmly recites the complete match rules and introductions. By the time he gets to weight classes, Kabuki is killing the Missing Link in the center of the ring with a dangerous Oriental nerve pinch. Brody and Gordy are out of the picture as the crowd focuses their chants on the struggling Missing Link. He tries to fight to his feet, with the crowd chanting his name. But it's to no avail, the nerve pinch is too disabling. Suddenly he fights back with a toe-stomp! Kabuki releases the hold and grasps his foot like a THREE STOOGES flick. Both wrestlers stagger briefly, before Link eats a thrust kick from the aging Kabuki. The evil and mysterious ninja plays to the crowd, with exaggerated hand gesture signaling the return of his deadly nerve pinch! Once again he clamps its paralyzing effect upon the shoulder and neck area of the Missing Link. Looks like a flabby old man with long hair and cheap face paint clamping a rest hold on a swollen, fungus-colored caveman with weird poofy hair.
Time for crowd shots as the mostly teenage audience cheers "Go Link go!" Kabuki releases the hold to showboat, but eats a plunging Link headbutt to the gut. Link is still dazed, and looks toward his fans for energy. Again he unloads with a falling head thrust into Kabuki's gut that's reminiscent of a "brontosaurus attack" (so says the commentator). The Missing Link is back in control, the crowd firmly behind him. He clasps Kabuki by his long hair and drives him face first into the top turnbuckle. Kabuki is down and the Link stands on his chest with both feet, using the ropes for added leverage. Crowd loves it. Missing Link moves off his opponent to study Kabuki's cornerman Michael Hayes actions at ringside. Hayes keeps the green-faced goon distracted long enough for Kabuki to rile the crowd up with more exaggerated gestures for the death pinch. But Link catches him in time and floors him again. To keep the Kabuki down, Link scales the ropes and delivers a diving forearm. Crowd roars it's approval.
Audience is hot now, and Link rewards their participation with… a giant bear hug! Kabuki performs a wildly exaggerated eye rake to escape. Both men writhe on the mat in pain, and Link checks his eyes to make sure they're still there. Hayes gives Kabuki some ringside advice, and the beaten old man drags himself to his feet to continue the attack. With his shoddy face paint melting off beneath hot arena lights, Kabuki takes Link down with a low spinning heel kick. Suddenly, the house announcers voice comes over the airwaves again. He says Bruiser Brody and Terry Gordy brawled out of the building and will not be returning. Crowd noises roise as Kabuki stands on the second rope strands and pounces onto Link with a FLYING variation of his always deadly nerve pinch.
Ref is checking. Shots of the ringside managers to fill time. Link is still dying on the mat, flopping like a fish out of water. His legs convulse wildly, allowing him to fight back to both knees – then both feet. He musters enough strength to propel Kabuki face first into the buckles again, stunning the Asian warrior. One more brontosaurus attack from Missing Link, and Kabuki is on the mat in pain. Hayes sees his charge down, and springs into action. He slides Kabuki a set of nun chucks, an illegal action the audience clearly sees (but the ref doesn't). Kabuki bides his time as the crowd goes bonkers, trying to alert the ref to the bad guys dubious actions. Nunchuck to the gut of an oncoming Missing Link! Another blow to the back, and the green-hued madman is on the mat struggling to breathe. Now Kabuki goes back into his nerve hold, only with a slight variation – clutching Link around the throat like a choke hold. "Something new and different!" screams the ringside commentator. A chair gets tossed into the ring and winds up in Links hands. He uses it to bang his OWN head the intimidation factor alone drive Kabuki out of the ring, where he flees with Michael Hayes. Announcer calls it a win for Link via DQ and we're done.
"My pleasure is people's pain". I'm done bombing on these other writers. We be like shroomz shits – clearing the whole house out. One.
WWE Classics on Demand (Sting's blow-out)
"Mad Dog" Buzz Sawyer with Great Muta and the Dragon Master
VERSUS
Ric Flair, Ole & Arn Anderson of the 4 Horsemen
Steel Cage Match
NWA Clash of the Champions X
2/6/1990
Black-n-white Snitsky promo to open. "My name is Snitsky. Most people think what I like to do is wrong… but I like to hurt people. Buzz Sawyer… ahh yes. He liked to hurt people too…" demented chuckle
We cut to a quick backstage promo from the Great Muta that is oddly devoid of any sound or commentary. Obviously muted for some reason. He pulls off his scary mask and flashes his green mouth towards the camera. Same silent treatment for Dragon Master, who pops up next in some kind of African tribal war mask. Finally sound hits the speakers for Buzz Sawyers backstage lineup. "BOOM! HA HA HA HA! This is sure hot!" he squeals. "The mad dog is ready!"
Cut to a dramatic shot of horses stampeding in slow motion. "4 Horsemen" logo and Ric Flair is live and direct to cut a quick (yet fiery) promo for the upcoming match. "You've got to face the worst nightmare of your wrestling careers!"
Cut to ringside as the 3 Horsemen enter the arena and cage to voracious boos from the audience. The announcer tells us Sting was originally scheduled to be part of this match, but is no longer down with the 4 Horsemen. Inside the cage Sawyer, Muta and Dragon Master wait. Ole & Arn Anderson are announced together and get a heated reaction. But Ric Flair gets the most boos, as he brandishes the big gold belt (but is only a 6x champ at this point in his career). Cut to the audience with a dozen kids holding up magazine covers with Stings face on it. "We Want STING!" chants from the crowd. "They don't know WHAT they want!" Jim Cornette exclaims on commentary.
Match starts with Arn Anderson and Buzz Sawyer duking it out center ring. Sawyer forces him into the ring rope and unloads with three unrestrained chops to Arns exposed chest piece. He follows that up with a bite to the throat followed by another hard chop. Arn is still hung up on the ropes, so Sawyer charges. Anderson quickly dodges and Buzz propels himself face and body first into the hard steel cage. But the pain doesn't last long, and the two men continue to brawl. Arn reverses an Irish whip and the Mad Dog winds up backfirst in the buckles. But Arn Anderson eats a big boot on the charge, which allows Sawyer to grab him up and hurl him into the cage (much to the crowds enjoyment). The crowd continues to cheer the perpetually heelish Mad Dog so much, Cornette remarks that it must be "for one night only".
Flair rushes the ring to attack Buzz but he no sells that too. Ole finally kicks him square in the back and Buzz charges the cage face first. Arn grabs him by his bald head and sends his nose into Flairs knee on the apron. Flair's legal in the ring, but Sawyer quickly fights him off – so Flair retaliates with an eye rake. Sawyer tags in Dragon Master who bounds into the ring a house afire. He overwhelms Flair and drives him into the corner turnbuckle. Hard chops. Irish whips Flair into the opposite ropes and floors him with a back elbow. Ole winds up tagging in and he clowns the spindly Dragon Master with his powerful offense. They continue to brawl until Dragon Master claws him with his own eye rake! Ole Anderson begs off! Dragon Master is on him, utterly relentless with his kicks and slaps. But one hard kick to the gut from Ole is enough to end that assault. Ole grabs him by the head and calls for a knee. His nephew Arn gleefully obliges, and Ole hurls Dragon Master face first into it. Arns in the ring but Dragon Master maneuvers for a tag and the Great Muta makes his debut! Crowd pops huge, so Arn pauses to soak it in. Muta plays to the audience before locking up.
Out of the clinch, Muta Irish whips Arn into the turnbuckle, and stings him with his patented handspring flying elbow (ala Tajari or Chyna). Arn is down, the crowd is wild and Muta snares him in his reverse STF. Suddenly, all hell breaks loose. Sting is running to ringside where he scales the outside cage in an effort to attack the Horsemen! Flair scales the inside walls to meet him at the top! Crowd is bananas! Referees are out trying to peel Sting off the cage. Brian Pillman comes out to try and harness the Stinger, but it's to no avail! He wants Flair! Tom Zenk is down now too! Inside the ring, the match continues with Buzz Sawyer pounding out Arn as the crowd keeps chanting "we want STING!" He's successfully been restrained and the officials (and his babyface friends) have drawn him back to the locker room.
Ole in control amidst the chaos. Whips Sawyer into the ropes and executes a SICK back body drop on the Mad Dog! Sawyer comes down halfway on the cage, causing his head and neck to bounce unnaturally off the mat at a vicious angle. Botched! But Sawyer survives and no sells the ensuing elbow drop from Ole. Sawyer is getting hulked up so Ole wisely begs off – then answers with more stick kicks and punches. Sawyer shrugs them off and tags in Muta. Meanwhile, STING is back! Huge cheers! He tries to scale the cage again, but Flair meets him at top to cut him off. Inside the ring, Buzz Sawyer is suplexing Arn hard to the mat. Mad Dog climbs the ropes, and strikes the Superfly cliff diving pose atop the top turnbuckle. Crowd pops but Sawyer misses the big splash, his body ricocheting off the mat. Now – history is made.
We don't actually SEE the injury occur, but when we cut back to ringside, Sting is surrounded by officials (as well as the Steiner Brothers) and he is visibly limping. He just completely blew out his knee on the cage walls, requiring complete reconstructive surgery. This blew a lot of plans the NWA had for their world title picture and Sting was laid up for a while.
Back in the ring, Dragon Master catches a stiff Arn Anderson spinebuster that causes another wild donnybrook to break out. The three horsemen briefly triple team the Dragon Master, before Arn spikes him with a DDT. Quick cover and the match is over. 3 Horsemen are the victors. Snitsky outro.
"No repentance.
No guilt.
No shame".
VERSUS
Ric Flair, Ole & Arn Anderson of the 4 Horsemen
Steel Cage Match
NWA Clash of the Champions X
2/6/1990
Black-n-white Snitsky promo to open. "My name is Snitsky. Most people think what I like to do is wrong… but I like to hurt people. Buzz Sawyer… ahh yes. He liked to hurt people too…" demented chuckle
We cut to a quick backstage promo from the Great Muta that is oddly devoid of any sound or commentary. Obviously muted for some reason. He pulls off his scary mask and flashes his green mouth towards the camera. Same silent treatment for Dragon Master, who pops up next in some kind of African tribal war mask. Finally sound hits the speakers for Buzz Sawyers backstage lineup. "BOOM! HA HA HA HA! This is sure hot!" he squeals. "The mad dog is ready!"
Cut to a dramatic shot of horses stampeding in slow motion. "4 Horsemen" logo and Ric Flair is live and direct to cut a quick (yet fiery) promo for the upcoming match. "You've got to face the worst nightmare of your wrestling careers!"
Cut to ringside as the 3 Horsemen enter the arena and cage to voracious boos from the audience. The announcer tells us Sting was originally scheduled to be part of this match, but is no longer down with the 4 Horsemen. Inside the cage Sawyer, Muta and Dragon Master wait. Ole & Arn Anderson are announced together and get a heated reaction. But Ric Flair gets the most boos, as he brandishes the big gold belt (but is only a 6x champ at this point in his career). Cut to the audience with a dozen kids holding up magazine covers with Stings face on it. "We Want STING!" chants from the crowd. "They don't know WHAT they want!" Jim Cornette exclaims on commentary.
Match starts with Arn Anderson and Buzz Sawyer duking it out center ring. Sawyer forces him into the ring rope and unloads with three unrestrained chops to Arns exposed chest piece. He follows that up with a bite to the throat followed by another hard chop. Arn is still hung up on the ropes, so Sawyer charges. Anderson quickly dodges and Buzz propels himself face and body first into the hard steel cage. But the pain doesn't last long, and the two men continue to brawl. Arn reverses an Irish whip and the Mad Dog winds up backfirst in the buckles. But Arn Anderson eats a big boot on the charge, which allows Sawyer to grab him up and hurl him into the cage (much to the crowds enjoyment). The crowd continues to cheer the perpetually heelish Mad Dog so much, Cornette remarks that it must be "for one night only".
Flair rushes the ring to attack Buzz but he no sells that too. Ole finally kicks him square in the back and Buzz charges the cage face first. Arn grabs him by his bald head and sends his nose into Flairs knee on the apron. Flair's legal in the ring, but Sawyer quickly fights him off – so Flair retaliates with an eye rake. Sawyer tags in Dragon Master who bounds into the ring a house afire. He overwhelms Flair and drives him into the corner turnbuckle. Hard chops. Irish whips Flair into the opposite ropes and floors him with a back elbow. Ole winds up tagging in and he clowns the spindly Dragon Master with his powerful offense. They continue to brawl until Dragon Master claws him with his own eye rake! Ole Anderson begs off! Dragon Master is on him, utterly relentless with his kicks and slaps. But one hard kick to the gut from Ole is enough to end that assault. Ole grabs him by the head and calls for a knee. His nephew Arn gleefully obliges, and Ole hurls Dragon Master face first into it. Arns in the ring but Dragon Master maneuvers for a tag and the Great Muta makes his debut! Crowd pops huge, so Arn pauses to soak it in. Muta plays to the audience before locking up.
Out of the clinch, Muta Irish whips Arn into the turnbuckle, and stings him with his patented handspring flying elbow (ala Tajari or Chyna). Arn is down, the crowd is wild and Muta snares him in his reverse STF. Suddenly, all hell breaks loose. Sting is running to ringside where he scales the outside cage in an effort to attack the Horsemen! Flair scales the inside walls to meet him at the top! Crowd is bananas! Referees are out trying to peel Sting off the cage. Brian Pillman comes out to try and harness the Stinger, but it's to no avail! He wants Flair! Tom Zenk is down now too! Inside the ring, the match continues with Buzz Sawyer pounding out Arn as the crowd keeps chanting "we want STING!" He's successfully been restrained and the officials (and his babyface friends) have drawn him back to the locker room.
Ole in control amidst the chaos. Whips Sawyer into the ropes and executes a SICK back body drop on the Mad Dog! Sawyer comes down halfway on the cage, causing his head and neck to bounce unnaturally off the mat at a vicious angle. Botched! But Sawyer survives and no sells the ensuing elbow drop from Ole. Sawyer is getting hulked up so Ole wisely begs off – then answers with more stick kicks and punches. Sawyer shrugs them off and tags in Muta. Meanwhile, STING is back! Huge cheers! He tries to scale the cage again, but Flair meets him at top to cut him off. Inside the ring, Buzz Sawyer is suplexing Arn hard to the mat. Mad Dog climbs the ropes, and strikes the Superfly cliff diving pose atop the top turnbuckle. Crowd pops but Sawyer misses the big splash, his body ricocheting off the mat. Now – history is made.
We don't actually SEE the injury occur, but when we cut back to ringside, Sting is surrounded by officials (as well as the Steiner Brothers) and he is visibly limping. He just completely blew out his knee on the cage walls, requiring complete reconstructive surgery. This blew a lot of plans the NWA had for their world title picture and Sting was laid up for a while.
Back in the ring, Dragon Master catches a stiff Arn Anderson spinebuster that causes another wild donnybrook to break out. The three horsemen briefly triple team the Dragon Master, before Arn spikes him with a DDT. Quick cover and the match is over. 3 Horsemen are the victors. Snitsky outro.
"No repentance.
No guilt.
No shame".
NXT Season One Finale (recap)
NXT opening montage, highlights from the entire season. Slater pins Jericho, Bryan attacks Cole, Tarver is eliminated. 5 Star video package. The three finalists get their solo shine at the end of the clip.
Cue NXT "8 rookies 8 pros 1 dream" theme.
Fireworks blazing. We're live from Dallas TX for the Season Finale! Cole and Matthews at ringside, they throw it to the host MATT STRIKER in the ring. He welcomes the audience and promises "tonight one rookie's dream comes true". Introduces the 5 eliminated rookies who are sitting peacefully (in street clothes) in the front row. Each get a name introduction.
Next, MATT STRIKER introduces the pros who come out to the NXT theme and line up on the stage (minus Carlito who was recently released for a Wellness policy violation). R-TRUTH proudly brandishes the US championship. CM PUNK comes out with his new black mask (the result of him losing a hair match at the last PPV, "Over the Edge")
Finally Striker intros the 3 finalists - WADE BARRETT (ranked #1), DAVID OTUNGA (ranked #2) and JUSTIN GABRIEL (ranked #3). They make their way inside the ring alongside MATT STRIKER.
Striker congratulates them and recaps their journey on the show. More Ryan Seacrest-type anticipation building. There will be two pros polls tonight, one for each elimination. "The pressure truly increases". He then announces a triple threat match between the finalists next! Back to Cole and Matthews at the announce table. They're hyping up NXT Season 2, starting next week.
Introducing HUSKY HARRIS (3rd generation superstar, BLACKJACK MULLIGAN is his grandfather and IRS is his father). He's 6'2" and 295 lbs. Fat boy with back tats. His Pro will be CODY RHODES. Back to the ring where JERICHO, R-TRUTH and MATT HARDY all make their way ringside to second their rookies in the upcoming triple threat match.
Commercial break.
Outside the arena shot. NXT Season 2 pro JOHN MORRISON is interviewed backstage. He touts his rookie as "a giant redwood tree". Introducing ELI COTTONWOOD. 7'1'' over 300 lbs. Cole says he is a "very strange dude".
Bell rings and we're off in the triple threat elimination match between the 3 NXT Season One finalists. They all size each other up. OTUNGA has silver glitter designs on the back of his skull. OTUNGA gets hit allowing WADE to pursue GABRIEL. Until OTUNGA quickly reenters the mix and stomps BARRETT out of the ring. Now OTUNGA has GABRIEL all to himself in the ring.
OTUNGA whips GABRIEL and clotheslines him twice before going for the pin. Only 2, and BARRETT is back in the ring. He tosses JUSTIN GABRIEL over the top rope and attacks OTUNGA with head butts and turnbuckle slams.
OTUNGA whips GABRIEL and clotheslines him twice before going for the pine. Only 2 and Barrett is back in. Tosses Justin over the ropes and attacks David with head butts and turnbuckle slams. Keeps Justin outside the ring. JERICHO is back at the announce table, screaming at Cole and Matthews to recognize the greatness of his rookie WADE BARRETT. Inside the ring, BARRETT sets up a suplex on OTUNGA but GABRIEL springboards over the top rope for the sunset flip cover. Only 2. Now Wade is tossed by OTUNGA and its Justin and David again. "The A-Lister" David Otunga backdrops Justin over the top rope onto Wade Barrett, who stands outside the ring. David follows them both outside and rolls Justin back in the ring. Only 2.
Justin on offense, kicks Wade again to make sure he stays outside of the ring. Scales the ropes to great anticipation from the crowd and absolutely nails David Otunga with the 450 splash!!! But Wade grabs Justin's ankle from outside the ring as he goes for the pin, and pulls him off Otunga and to the floor. Wade then quickly reenters the ring and PINS David Otunga!!! The A-Lister has been eliminated from the triple threat match!!!
Commercial break.
WADE is pounding on Gabriel in the ring, Abdominal stretch as the announcers recap their individual accomplishments during the season. Pros watch intently from the ramp. Big elbow drop from WADE. Whips Justin to the buckle but misses the running splash. Kicks from Justin soften Barrett up, and he hits the big man with his back roll counter into a spin kick. Justin tries to get the crowd engaged before hitting a Stinger splash in the corner and a springboard body block. Only 2. Barrett fights back and goes for his finisher, but Justin counters into a sunset flip. Jericho on the apron but Wade kicks out. STO from Justin, setting the big man up for the 450. Climbs ropes... launches the 450... but lands directly on Barretts knees! A spectacular counter to Justin's already injured ribs. Small package by Barrett gets the 3!!! WADE BARRETT wins the rookie triple threat match!!!
Jericho in ring to celebrate while the rest of the pros give modest applause and take notes. Wade Barrett wins the match!
Matt Striker on the ramp with the pros, calls for the huddle and asks for the first pros poll of the night. The pros congregate. Back to the announcers Cole and Matthews. More NXT Season 2 hype.
They throw it backstage to NXT Season 2 pro MVP who will be mentoring PERCY WATSON. Flamboyant bald headed black guy who acts fruity and obnoxious. A "self professed ladies man" who wears goofy red spectacles. Meanwhile the props ares still discussing the first elimination.
Commercial break.
ZACH RYDER Season 2 pro. Introducing TITUS O'NEIL. Big deep-voiced bald headed black guy who speaks cordially and looks like a WWE-styled beast. Back to host MATT STRIKER who has the three finalists lined up in the ring. He hits ringside where the eliminated rookies are sitting and ask them who they think should be eliminated.
TARVER chooses himself again. Striker then flips the script and asks them who they think should WIN.
DANIEL BRYAN (big pop) thinks Otunga can't wrestle and Justin can't talk, so WADE BARRETT should win.
SKIP SHEFFIELD "doesn't care" who should win NXT. Good pop for that.
DARREN YOUNG says WADE will win cuz he's built for it mentally and physically. He then heels on Dallas TX real quick and cheers on Wade to a chorus of boos.
HEATH SLATER (minor pop) says WADE will probably win (though he apologizes to the crowd for his answer). Finally it's pro poll time...
WADE #1
The bottom two step forward. More Striker/Seacrest hype. Dramatic pause. Drumroll...
OTUNGA #2!!!!
That means Justin Gabriel has been eliminated!!! He's given the mic where he says he's "Just a kid from South Africa living his dream". But this dream isn't over, so Justin promises to "keep coming back and keep coming back" till he makes it in this country. Showed some passion there. Promises to be world champion someday. Good pop. MATT HARDY gives him his props and Justin is ushered off the show.
Introducing LAY-COOL (first ever female pros). Their rookie is so "teeny tiny". Introducing KAVAL!!! Low-Ki!!! BROOKLYN BABY!!! Will love to see LAY-COOL try to make him "carry their belts". Exciting!
Commercial break.
NXT has been the #1 show on SyFy since it's debut.
Back to Mark Henry, Season 2 pro. Introducing LUCKY CANNON. Looks like Curt Hawkins with darker hair and a shoulder tat. Has a "very interesting story" we're going to want to hear about, promises COLE.
Back to the ring where WADE and OTUNGA are flanked by STRIKER. He announces a final rookie face off. 60 seconds to tell the other rookie why they should be eliminated, and why you should be the winner.
OTUNGA goes first and calls Wade ugly. "You don't intimidate anyone but your dentist". The only triple threat match Otunga wants to see is between Barrett "Aquafresh and Listerine" (minor chuckles from the audience). OTUNGA is the pretty boy. He's not so hot in the ring, but that can be taught. Not charisma.
It's Wade's turn, and he laces into him, saying he's a ratings killer. "I'm a fighter that's why I've got a broken nose". Disses Otunga's flexibility and agility. Add two letter in front of "IT factor" and that's Wade's opinion of OTUNGA. STRIKER calls for the final pros poll..
Introducing Season 2 pro KOFI KINGSTON. Son of WWE hall of Famer MR PERFECT. This man is gonna make his own mark. MICHAEL MCGILLICUTTY(???) Wrestling royalty. Ruthless aggression is back.
Commercial break.
Back to Cole and Matthews who say the voting for NXT Season 2 will be a little different. 50% pros 50% WWE universe. Back to the ring with Striker and the two finalists as the rest of the eliminated rookies look on glumly.
But the MIZ interrupts with a "very important announcement". He's back for Season 2!!! Takes another shot at Daniel Bryan. Introducing ALEX RILEY. Goofy preppy white boy. Looks like another Spirit Squader.
Finally STRIKER announces the last pros poll.
Regal suddenly starts congratulating Jericho, but R-Truth cuts in. Regal disses Jennifer Hudson! Punk agrees but Truth shuts him up. Regal congratulates Barrett again. Pros argue among themselves. Truth gets in Regals face. Regal begs him to do something. Truth jukes and jives and thrusts his hips toward Regal. now Christian jumps in and says Regal hasn't won a fight in years. Jericho tries to calm Regal down but they're talking over each other. Punk walks out. Jericho wants props for being the winning pro. Striker calls for order but Regal shouts him down again.
Back to the results...
....
WADE BARRETT is the winner!!! Announced at 11:01 EST. OTUNGA looks dejected. He gets the first interview. Thinks he's getting punked by Ashton Kutcher. Credits his wife for losing American Idol but being the biggest star that show ever saw. So OTUNGA is still the biggest break out star. Mic to BARRETT for his congratulatory promo. "The era of WADE BARRETT" is beginning. Cue Jericho's theme (Barrett never got the original theme song he "won" on one of the NXT competitions).
Replay of the intro package from the top of the show.
There was only one match (the triple threat) and it was sloppy and poorly timed. The build up for Season 2 was exciting and I'm already wondering where they're going with some of these new guys. I hope the Season One rejects don't get lost in the shuffle, as I'm a big fan of all of them - especially Michael Tarver. The dynamic between the pros was awesome, even though the pros line-up for Season 2 seems a little weak on paper. I thought of the three finalists DAVID OTUNGA "needed" the win the most, so it will be fun to see where things go from here now that Wade Barrett is the chosen one. Can't wait to see Kaval and Joe Hennig next week!!!
Cue NXT "8 rookies 8 pros 1 dream" theme.
Fireworks blazing. We're live from Dallas TX for the Season Finale! Cole and Matthews at ringside, they throw it to the host MATT STRIKER in the ring. He welcomes the audience and promises "tonight one rookie's dream comes true". Introduces the 5 eliminated rookies who are sitting peacefully (in street clothes) in the front row. Each get a name introduction.
Next, MATT STRIKER introduces the pros who come out to the NXT theme and line up on the stage (minus Carlito who was recently released for a Wellness policy violation). R-TRUTH proudly brandishes the US championship. CM PUNK comes out with his new black mask (the result of him losing a hair match at the last PPV, "Over the Edge")
Finally Striker intros the 3 finalists - WADE BARRETT (ranked #1), DAVID OTUNGA (ranked #2) and JUSTIN GABRIEL (ranked #3). They make their way inside the ring alongside MATT STRIKER.
Striker congratulates them and recaps their journey on the show. More Ryan Seacrest-type anticipation building. There will be two pros polls tonight, one for each elimination. "The pressure truly increases". He then announces a triple threat match between the finalists next! Back to Cole and Matthews at the announce table. They're hyping up NXT Season 2, starting next week.
Introducing HUSKY HARRIS (3rd generation superstar, BLACKJACK MULLIGAN is his grandfather and IRS is his father). He's 6'2" and 295 lbs. Fat boy with back tats. His Pro will be CODY RHODES. Back to the ring where JERICHO, R-TRUTH and MATT HARDY all make their way ringside to second their rookies in the upcoming triple threat match.
Commercial break.
Outside the arena shot. NXT Season 2 pro JOHN MORRISON is interviewed backstage. He touts his rookie as "a giant redwood tree". Introducing ELI COTTONWOOD. 7'1'' over 300 lbs. Cole says he is a "very strange dude".
Bell rings and we're off in the triple threat elimination match between the 3 NXT Season One finalists. They all size each other up. OTUNGA has silver glitter designs on the back of his skull. OTUNGA gets hit allowing WADE to pursue GABRIEL. Until OTUNGA quickly reenters the mix and stomps BARRETT out of the ring. Now OTUNGA has GABRIEL all to himself in the ring.
OTUNGA whips GABRIEL and clotheslines him twice before going for the pin. Only 2, and BARRETT is back in the ring. He tosses JUSTIN GABRIEL over the top rope and attacks OTUNGA with head butts and turnbuckle slams.
OTUNGA whips GABRIEL and clotheslines him twice before going for the pine. Only 2 and Barrett is back in. Tosses Justin over the ropes and attacks David with head butts and turnbuckle slams. Keeps Justin outside the ring. JERICHO is back at the announce table, screaming at Cole and Matthews to recognize the greatness of his rookie WADE BARRETT. Inside the ring, BARRETT sets up a suplex on OTUNGA but GABRIEL springboards over the top rope for the sunset flip cover. Only 2. Now Wade is tossed by OTUNGA and its Justin and David again. "The A-Lister" David Otunga backdrops Justin over the top rope onto Wade Barrett, who stands outside the ring. David follows them both outside and rolls Justin back in the ring. Only 2.
Justin on offense, kicks Wade again to make sure he stays outside of the ring. Scales the ropes to great anticipation from the crowd and absolutely nails David Otunga with the 450 splash!!! But Wade grabs Justin's ankle from outside the ring as he goes for the pin, and pulls him off Otunga and to the floor. Wade then quickly reenters the ring and PINS David Otunga!!! The A-Lister has been eliminated from the triple threat match!!!
Commercial break.
WADE is pounding on Gabriel in the ring, Abdominal stretch as the announcers recap their individual accomplishments during the season. Pros watch intently from the ramp. Big elbow drop from WADE. Whips Justin to the buckle but misses the running splash. Kicks from Justin soften Barrett up, and he hits the big man with his back roll counter into a spin kick. Justin tries to get the crowd engaged before hitting a Stinger splash in the corner and a springboard body block. Only 2. Barrett fights back and goes for his finisher, but Justin counters into a sunset flip. Jericho on the apron but Wade kicks out. STO from Justin, setting the big man up for the 450. Climbs ropes... launches the 450... but lands directly on Barretts knees! A spectacular counter to Justin's already injured ribs. Small package by Barrett gets the 3!!! WADE BARRETT wins the rookie triple threat match!!!
Jericho in ring to celebrate while the rest of the pros give modest applause and take notes. Wade Barrett wins the match!
Matt Striker on the ramp with the pros, calls for the huddle and asks for the first pros poll of the night. The pros congregate. Back to the announcers Cole and Matthews. More NXT Season 2 hype.
They throw it backstage to NXT Season 2 pro MVP who will be mentoring PERCY WATSON. Flamboyant bald headed black guy who acts fruity and obnoxious. A "self professed ladies man" who wears goofy red spectacles. Meanwhile the props ares still discussing the first elimination.
Commercial break.
ZACH RYDER Season 2 pro. Introducing TITUS O'NEIL. Big deep-voiced bald headed black guy who speaks cordially and looks like a WWE-styled beast. Back to host MATT STRIKER who has the three finalists lined up in the ring. He hits ringside where the eliminated rookies are sitting and ask them who they think should be eliminated.
TARVER chooses himself again. Striker then flips the script and asks them who they think should WIN.
DANIEL BRYAN (big pop) thinks Otunga can't wrestle and Justin can't talk, so WADE BARRETT should win.
SKIP SHEFFIELD "doesn't care" who should win NXT. Good pop for that.
DARREN YOUNG says WADE will win cuz he's built for it mentally and physically. He then heels on Dallas TX real quick and cheers on Wade to a chorus of boos.
HEATH SLATER (minor pop) says WADE will probably win (though he apologizes to the crowd for his answer). Finally it's pro poll time...
WADE #1
The bottom two step forward. More Striker/Seacrest hype. Dramatic pause. Drumroll...
OTUNGA #2!!!!
That means Justin Gabriel has been eliminated!!! He's given the mic where he says he's "Just a kid from South Africa living his dream". But this dream isn't over, so Justin promises to "keep coming back and keep coming back" till he makes it in this country. Showed some passion there. Promises to be world champion someday. Good pop. MATT HARDY gives him his props and Justin is ushered off the show.
Introducing LAY-COOL (first ever female pros). Their rookie is so "teeny tiny". Introducing KAVAL!!! Low-Ki!!! BROOKLYN BABY!!! Will love to see LAY-COOL try to make him "carry their belts". Exciting!
Commercial break.
NXT has been the #1 show on SyFy since it's debut.
Back to Mark Henry, Season 2 pro. Introducing LUCKY CANNON. Looks like Curt Hawkins with darker hair and a shoulder tat. Has a "very interesting story" we're going to want to hear about, promises COLE.
Back to the ring where WADE and OTUNGA are flanked by STRIKER. He announces a final rookie face off. 60 seconds to tell the other rookie why they should be eliminated, and why you should be the winner.
OTUNGA goes first and calls Wade ugly. "You don't intimidate anyone but your dentist". The only triple threat match Otunga wants to see is between Barrett "Aquafresh and Listerine" (minor chuckles from the audience). OTUNGA is the pretty boy. He's not so hot in the ring, but that can be taught. Not charisma.
It's Wade's turn, and he laces into him, saying he's a ratings killer. "I'm a fighter that's why I've got a broken nose". Disses Otunga's flexibility and agility. Add two letter in front of "IT factor" and that's Wade's opinion of OTUNGA. STRIKER calls for the final pros poll..
Introducing Season 2 pro KOFI KINGSTON. Son of WWE hall of Famer MR PERFECT. This man is gonna make his own mark. MICHAEL MCGILLICUTTY(???) Wrestling royalty. Ruthless aggression is back.
Commercial break.
Back to Cole and Matthews who say the voting for NXT Season 2 will be a little different. 50% pros 50% WWE universe. Back to the ring with Striker and the two finalists as the rest of the eliminated rookies look on glumly.
But the MIZ interrupts with a "very important announcement". He's back for Season 2!!! Takes another shot at Daniel Bryan. Introducing ALEX RILEY. Goofy preppy white boy. Looks like another Spirit Squader.
Finally STRIKER announces the last pros poll.
Regal suddenly starts congratulating Jericho, but R-Truth cuts in. Regal disses Jennifer Hudson! Punk agrees but Truth shuts him up. Regal congratulates Barrett again. Pros argue among themselves. Truth gets in Regals face. Regal begs him to do something. Truth jukes and jives and thrusts his hips toward Regal. now Christian jumps in and says Regal hasn't won a fight in years. Jericho tries to calm Regal down but they're talking over each other. Punk walks out. Jericho wants props for being the winning pro. Striker calls for order but Regal shouts him down again.
Back to the results...
....
WADE BARRETT is the winner!!! Announced at 11:01 EST. OTUNGA looks dejected. He gets the first interview. Thinks he's getting punked by Ashton Kutcher. Credits his wife for losing American Idol but being the biggest star that show ever saw. So OTUNGA is still the biggest break out star. Mic to BARRETT for his congratulatory promo. "The era of WADE BARRETT" is beginning. Cue Jericho's theme (Barrett never got the original theme song he "won" on one of the NXT competitions).
Replay of the intro package from the top of the show.
There was only one match (the triple threat) and it was sloppy and poorly timed. The build up for Season 2 was exciting and I'm already wondering where they're going with some of these new guys. I hope the Season One rejects don't get lost in the shuffle, as I'm a big fan of all of them - especially Michael Tarver. The dynamic between the pros was awesome, even though the pros line-up for Season 2 seems a little weak on paper. I thought of the three finalists DAVID OTUNGA "needed" the win the most, so it will be fun to see where things go from here now that Wade Barrett is the chosen one. Can't wait to see Kaval and Joe Hennig next week!!!
BORN TO BE WIRED (Terry Funk vs Sabu)
The mat is all blue. Ring ropes have been replaced by razor sharp barbed wire. ECW regulars fill out the backdrop. FUNK wears tights and a T-shirt, SABU only in his Arabian balloon pants. This is going to be fun.
They circle cautiously while BILL ALPHONSO makes a spectacle of himself outside the ring. TERRY FUNK gets a massive pop. Match begins with SABU cornering FUNK in the corner, while both remain cautious to engage. A few jabs from FUNK whiff, and it’s a pseudo-MMA start. FUNK in a boxing stance, not wrestling. SABU misses the dropkick to the leg and FUNK wisely follows him to the mat with a leg lock. SABU fights back with punches, but that only aggravates the FUNKER, so he picks SABU up off the mat and shows him how it’s done, with stiff punches and an irish whip towards the barbed wire strands!!! But SABU puts on the brakes and walks it off. Close call!
They circle again. SABU lunges in with a kick to the gut and tries to whip FUNK into the barbed wire! But FUNK dives to the mat, and slides under the barbed wire rope safely to the outside. He points to his head so we all know who’s got the brains here. Slowly he makes his way back in, but SABU stomps the crap out of him and locks in the Camel Clutch. Ref waves off the bell so SABU breaks the hold, and Funk is right back up. They circle, lock up and now FUNK takes control with a reverse neck breaker.
HUGE piledriver from FUNK that spikes SABU to the mat in a dramatic moment. DDT continues the ferocity and FUNK thinks it’s time. He drags SABU by the hair to the barbed wire strands and tries to shove his face into it! But SABU reverses with an elbow to the belly and then tries to return the favor by running FUNKS face into the ropes!! But FUNK blocks it with his hands and the crowd intensity is building. Chops from SABU but FUNK still won’t go into the wire. So SABU punches him and hits him with a hurricanrana for 1… 2…. FUNK kicks out with authority propelling SABU’s unclothed torso into the barbed wire strands! Our first taste of metal!
ALPHONSO checks on his charge while SABU is seemingly stunned by the turn of events. FUNK hammers him down and this time SUCCESSFULLY savages SABU’s face by grinding into the barbed wire strands!!! SABU rolls across the ring in uncontrollable pain. SABU is bleeding from the forehead. TERRY FUNK picks him up off the mat and flings him back first into the barbed wire strands, in an infamous moment immortalized on countless ECW montages and greatest hits packages. SABU is crucified upon the barbed wire ropes! The brutality!!! He peels himself off the ropes and FUNK is right on top of him. Scoops SABU up into an atomic drop position… before CROTCHING him on the barbed wire ropes! Crowd sickly appreciative.
SABU can’t even untangle himself so FUNK offers a hand by ripping his damn pants off and shredding his testicles. SABU is wearing pants like ZACH RYDER now (circa 2010). Another horrifying Irish whip across the ring impales SABU again back first into the barbed wire strands on the opposite side of the ring. Something is dreadfully wrong as the barbed wire VISBILY pierces SABU’s right forearm and STICKS there like it’s ripping a flannel shirt. But it’s SABU’s skin!
SABU peels himself off and the ref checks on him. To their feet, TERRY FUNK hits the juking jabs combo before flooring SABU with a left hand. FUNK plays to the blood-thirsty crowd and stands over SABU with his fist raised. Drags SABU to his feet and now its RIC FLAIR chop time. WHOOOOO!!! Feeling cocky and with the match under his control, FUNK sets SABU up for another Irish whip – but SABU reverses and finally it’s TERRY FUNK who finds himself entangled in the barbed wire!!!
He dramatically sells the pain as SABU makes sure he’s all tied up. His shirt is sticking to the barbs as he tries to escape, so SABU slams him with a steel chair to the back a few times. FUNK crawls to the center of the ring but 2 more chair shots put him down. SABU sets up the chair in sitting position before taking the time to visibly blade FUNK along the barbed wire strands. Now SABU has a weapon. He stabs FUNK in the forehead with the prison shank and the horror continues.
FUNK in 619-position along the barbed wire strands, so SABU streaks across the ring and propels himself off the steel chair (he had previously set up) with a flying leg lariat, pushing FUNK even further into the tangle of razor sharp barbed wire. “E-C-DUB! E-C-DUB!!!” SABU plays to the crowd and goes for the pin. Only 2.
FUNK drags himself to his feet but SABU is on him with punches, driving him into the turnbuckle where the FUNKER is cornered. SABU quickly realigns the steel chair to set up FUNK for another leg lariat. But this time, FUNK moves and SABU crashes recklessly into the barbed wire with full force!!! He shreds his arm!!! Calls out for aid from BILL ALPHONSO on the outside, while FUNK rolls around in mock pain buying him time. Close-up of the wound on SABU’s bicep is pretty saucy. FUNK over with a few weak punches to SABU’s head and then goes for the cover. Nothing.
ALPHONSO returns with the athletic tape and SABU makes a hasty tourniquet while FUNK sets up two chairs in the ring. SABU can’t even finish wrapping up the wound before FUNK picks him up and hits a reverse neckbreaker on the two chairs. SABU still frantically trying to tie up his arm. FUNK slowly fuollows up. Suddenly SABU flares to life and the two engage ina spirited duke out. FUNK wins, his final punch driving SABU back to the mat. FUNK (bloodied face and all) taunts SABU.
FUNK just flails away at SABU who bails to the outside of the ring. FUNK follows and they brawl outside by the fans. FUNK gouges SABU’s face into the barbed wire again before rolling him back int eh ring. Now FUNK has the ankle and administers the spinning toe hold! But he’s forced to quickly break it when ALPHONSO hops to the ring apron. So FUNK attempts to drag him over the top rope into the ring, but its barbed wire! So ALPHONSO gets stuck and painfully jerked! SABU from behind but FUNK counters into a suplex… but then DROPS SABU chest and stomach first onto the barbed wire ropes! BRUTAL! ALPHONSO gets slapped around for fun, with FUNK ripping his shirt off entirely and raking his bare back with a weapon. ALPHONSO rolls out of the ring, so FUNK grabs the wire cutters and cuts himself a nice strand of barbed wire to use.
He begins WHIPPING SABU with the wire, causing SABU at one point to get his hair and head momentarily stuck in the wire. FUNK chases ALPHONSO back outside where he goes into the guardrail and onto a wooden table (that falls over). FUNK is all over ALPHONSO on the outside, giving SABU enough time to cut his own strand of barbed wire and catch FUNK crawling back into the ring with it. Punches and jabs with the barbed wire to FUNK’s head put him back on the mat. Suddenly RVD runs in and SABU gives him the go head to ground and pound FUNK, which he does - kicking him all the way out of the ring where ALPHONSO resets up the fallen table. Now FUNK is completely wrapped in barbed wire. The wire even sticks to the ring apron, which RVD has major trouble trying to dislodge. FUNK is absolutely wrapped to death in barbed wire, and RVD hammers him into position on the table… where SABU flies over the ropes and crashes into FUNK (wrapped in wire) with a legdrop, driving them both through the table and to the hard concrete floor!
But here’s TOMMY DREAMER for the save! He clobbers RVD with a trash can lid just out of camera range.
He slings RVD over his shoulder cave-man style and drags him out of the arena while FUNK (still wrapped in barbed wire) and SABU re-enter the ring. SABU tries to cover him for the pin, but the dude is wrapped in barbed wire! So he can’t! Pulls FUNK very gingerly to the outside of the ring and rests him on another conveniently placed table. Crowd swells with enthusiasm as SABU rockets across the ring to grab MORE barbed wire strands and wraps his own body in them. Then he leg drops FUNK from the ring apron through the table, both men completely engulfed in barbed wire!!! The ring apron, SABU’s pants and FUNKS clothes are completely shredded along with copious amounts of human flesh. Both men are STUCK together with the barbed wire! The ref tries to unwrap them to no avail. So he and ALPHONSO just heave the two men back into the ring where they are like Barbed-wire Siamese twins. There is a LONG stretch of time with both wrestlers just trying to get untangled. It’s painful just to watch.
BILL ALPHONSO has to break out the wire cutters to free them in another long, potential crowd-killing moment. Now the ring fills up with people who try to help untangle them. Finally, TOMMY DREAMER is out to help as well. These dudes are caught and cut up, to be sure. Answers the old question “how many medics does it take to cut two men out of barbed wire?” The answer is about half a dozen. Various camera close-ups illustrate how gruesome and painful this actually is. Finally they are separated and the crowd cheers. The main event for ECW’s “Born To Be Wired” lives up to the billing.
CZW's Un FN Believable (2001)
CZW Un'FN'Believable 4/14/01 FEATURES THE SICKEST MATCH OF ALL TIME.
1. Nick Berk vs Z-Barr
2. Briscoe Brothers vs Danny Rose and Jeff Rocker
3. Ruckus vs Hurricane Kid
4. Nate Hatred and Hardcore Nick Gage vs Jon Dahmer & Eddie Valentine
5. Ric Blade vs Trent Acid vs Reckless
6. Nick Mondo & Jun Kasai vs Justice Pain & Johnny Kashmere...This is the match everybody is talking about. THE SICKEST MATCH EVER IN PRO WRESTLING. This bout was filled with hundreds of lightbulbs, plus barbed wire, bats, & tons of other weapons. RF Video has exclusive footage that nobody else has as Rob Feinstein took the camera in the backstage area. You will see Jun Kasai's flesh wound and see his bone. We followed him into the shower to wash the blood off and then get stitched up. During the match Kasai also had his tail on fire.
7. Lobo vs Mad Man Pondo in the No Ropes Barbed Wire Match for the CZW Iron Man Championship. Another extremely sick and bloody match filled with tons of objects
Dusting off the old DVD collection for a rare look back at one of Combat Zone Wrestling’s earliest events. Coined “Un FN Believable”, it took place on April 14th 2001 in some dirty auditorium somewhere in front of about 100 people (if that). Production values, lightning, accessories (and ring action) is nowhere near what it would become in just a few more years. Envision your average underground indy show, and you’ve got a good visual for this.
Nick Berk and Z-Barr open the show (after a little mic work) and exhibit some standard indy-level highly-choreographed exchanges. I think Nick Berk got a couple of try-outs with WWE a few years later, but that’s the furthest either one of these guys went in the industry. There was also a tag match featuring my dude Nate Hatred, who's kinda like a new school DC Drake with rock star hair. He's one of the two, maybe three guys here tonight who actually "looks" the part of a pro wrestler.
A VERY young Briscoe Brothers are up next against their opponents Danny Rose and Jeff Rocker (who take the mic pre-match and lament their lack of a title shot). For an idea of how young and fresh the Briscoe Bros are here, I don’t spot ONE shitty tattoo on either one of them. Jeff Rocker actually looks the thickest and most well-built of all the scrawny pencil-necked geeks on this card, and his partner “Doomsday” Danny Rose exhibits the most in-match charisma (including a few funny exchanges with the ref, like when an astounded Danny Rose exclaimed “and they’re supposed to be the babyfaces!” after the Briscoe’s ran in to break up a pin). Briscoe Brothers win. The shaky, extreme-close-up style of video production here is starting to give off a little “Blair Witch Project” effect (IE: motion sickness).
Mark Briscoe
Up next, my dude Ruckus (who would go on to form BLKOUT a few years later). This is from early in his career when he weighed almost 300 pounds, and it sure looks like it. He looks exactly like Kenan Thompson from “Good Burger” with a red bandanna tied “Thug Life” style around his head.
His opponent tonight is “Hurricane Kid” – NOT to be confused with the Human Tornado or Hurricane Helms. When he first came through the curtain, I thought he was just another member of the audience. Skinny little white boy who looks two days removed from wrestling in somebody’s backyard. Ruckus and Hurricane Kid open the match with another flurry of over-rehearsed indy counters and reversals while some dick in the audience starts yelling “BORING!” The ring action is standard for the course, some fun back-n-forth action before it nearly crashes and burns when Hurricane Kid botches a hurricanrana attempt from the top rope to the arena floor – bashing the back of his head on the hard-ass tile. Again the cinematography is ill because every time the camera guy moves around he catches the dialogue of surrounding people and security (and their off-hand comments reveal just how amateur this whole production is – which is really half the charm). Hurricane Kid continues to show classic indy determination when he tries that hurricanrana AGAIN inside the ring and STILL can’t clear the complete rotation. Of note – Hurricane Kid is most famous for his “chair incident” in CZW, in which he was tied up tree-of-woe style in the corner and his opponent Ruckus chucked a steel chair at his head that legit KOd him and split his head open. BUT he and Ruckus actually do that spot successfully tonight! (a full two or three years before the “incident” that would become the Kid’s career highlight). Nothing to see here, but a lot of the high-flying lucha stuff here is made extra effective by the fact there is no padding outside the ring! Just hard-ass tile floor. So seeing 300-pound Ruckus busting out a space flying tiger drop is actually a “WHOA” moment. Good stuff. Ruckus wins.
Ruckus
Another personal favorite of mine is the Ric Blade - Trent Acid - Reckless Youth 3-way elimination dance. And speaking of hard-ass tile floor, that would come into play again when Ric Blade - one of Zandig's first CZW students - completely busts his shit up when he tries this crazy Jeff Hardy-isque spinning somersault senton from the top rope. He does a complete belly flop right on his hip and leg and is quickly, and obviously injured. The handheld camera zooming around chasing the action picks up a few people talking about the injury, but nobody really knows what to do. So Trent Acid and Reckless Youth finally decide to pick up the match themselves back in the ring while Ric Blade is tended to outside. Reckless Youth is an interesting case because I remember when he was like, the next big thing in indy wrestling. The CM Punk, Samoa Joe, Christopher Daniels kind of prospect, but outside of a WWE developmental deals and what not Reckless Youth never made much of an impact. He and the flamboyant (and obviously Jeff Hardy circa 2001-swagger jacking) Trent Acid have a nice little counter/reversal/run really fast exchange and finally Ric Blade (or "Ric FUCKIN Blade" as the CZW chants say) gets back into the action. A few moments of tense silence as his earlier injury is still so fresh, but he manages to work through it and get back to playing. This is one of my favorite matches on the DVD because I think it epitomizes what the early CZW product (and in turn, 99% of the small time indy feds) is really all about. Ric FN Blade is one of owner John Zandigs first pupils, so of course he's going to get the hometown push. Just like Lobo and Justice Pain will later, and why Nick Gage was wrestling in a tag team title match earlier in the night. It's all love. Even though these guys look nothing like dangerous, big tough wrestlers, and more like zealous, backyard wrestlers. Ric Blade in particular just looks straight white trash. And he has a history of fucking himself up big time at CZW shows (breaking ankles, smashing bones, having to removed on stretchers legit) because they're just not that good. But of course, here tonight at Un FN Believable, Reckless Youth is eliminated first before Ric Blade sets up Trent Acid for the climatic spot of the night - a big swanton off a trailer outside the arena putting Trent Acid through a table. Blade even looks up to the camera for approval, asking "didja get that???" Match was ruled a no-contest I think but the crowd got to chant "Ric FUCKIN Blade!" a bunch of times.
Ric Blade
Another first-school graduate, Justice Pain gets the semi-main event spot and of all the homegrown CZW talent he looks the most imposing. At least he looks like a guy that's seen the inside of a gym (or at least the syringe tip of a needle), unlike the other guys who looked like they just hopped over the railing. Justice Pain gets mic time after Johnny Kashmere cuts some whiny "I Quit" speech. Justice Pain begs for him to come back; the CZW audience respects you (they don't). So they make up and challenge their opponents for the night. "Last Resort" by Papa Roach blares the soundsystem and "Sick" Nick Mondo and Jun Kasai (two of my all-time faves) make their entrance wielding weaponry - the first of which we've seen tonight. So far it's all been a decent to middling independent wrestling event. Here's the kind of match CZW would emphasizes and become best known for.
Justice Pain
The video touts this as "the sickest match in CZW history", but truth be told it's a traditional "death match". Granted the novelty of such extremity was still pretty new to the genre, as many promotions scrambled to fill the void by ECW and raise the bar accordingly. These four guys brawl all over the place, with Mondo and Kashmere pairing up while Justice Pain and Jun Kasai take it through the crowd and into the backroom area. Kashmere looks like he doesn't really want to play, and a bare chested Nick Mondo winds up taking most of the punishment. All kinds of sick stuff, like broken lightube fragments sticking out of backs, shards of glass everywhere and crimson galore. Finally in the most climatic moment in the match, Justice Pain and Kashmere combine to launch Jun Kasai over the top rope through a death trap of tables and florescent light tubes. Exciting crash and burn, and finally the camera man zooms in on a gaping hole in Kasai's left elbow. Bare bone can be seen. And that's still not the finish. Johnny Kashmere FINALLY gets into the match, after pretty much just walking around with his shirt on hitting Mondo with stuff and seemingly resisting a lot of big shots to himself. But now he just says "fuck it!" takes his shirt off, scales the top rope, and misses a somersault senton to the outside through a regular table. That's the finish, and "Sick" Nick Mondo and Jun Kasai are victorious. Kasai is back in the ring after cameras caught an assistant tieing a homebrewed tourniquet around his arm, ala Sabu - ironically the same name Kasai has written on his hand wraps with black marker. Sabu.
Lobo
Night's still not over yet though, as Madman Pondo and Lobo clash in the main event for the CZW Iron man championship in a No Ropes Barbed Wire Match. Pondo is at his aesthetically non-pleasing worst tonight, with a whispy mullet and a Juggalo hockey shirt. Lobo couldn't look more average or unassuming, even with the "GI Joe" logo emblazoned on his black t-shirt. Again, truly the definition of "weekend warriors". The up close intimacy with the fans is both a blessing and a boon for the show. It illustrates the connection between the performers and the regulars (especially when every little exchange can be picked up on camera), but it also makes for some awkward silences and little to no genuine "pops". Despite the horrific trappings of this match, it's almost played out more for comedy. Pondo and Lobo exchange a couple of sloppy strikes and shoves, before just deciding to break keyfabe and work together to create a ladder/chair contraption in the middle of the ring. Team work in a Death Match! I think Pondo went through it. A few more awkward spots on the outside, when Madman Pondo just... can't... figure out a way to stand on the ring apron when the ropes are made of barbed wire. He just can't stand up on the apron for the big spot, and it's kind of humorous in its futility. More shuffling around to set up the next big spot. Funny moment when some random crowd voice implores Pondo to "raise the bar, Pondo!" Do something different! So he sets up a chair on a table outside the ring, gently sits Lobo in the chair, and then does a fat guy outta control plancha over the barbed wire ropes to hit Lobo and break the table. Pretty pedestrian bump over all. Finally Pondo gets his jersey stripped off in the ring (revealing why he keeps that thing on - huge, fat and pasty), and winds up taking a bare chested hang mans drop on the barbed wire ropes after being pitched off the ladder. Camera's zoom in on the jagged slash on his right pectoral beginning to ooze blood, while hometown hero Lobo scales the ladder and retrieves his belt. Good night America.
Madman Pondo
Cameras follow the boys backstage, where Jun Kasai's wounds are all the more frightening. Absolutely brutal, jagged slashes throughout his back and arms like he just got attacked by a sword-wielding Berzerker. And of course, the hole in his elbow that is now clearly showing bone. Ill look behind the curtain of an indy show though, years before "The Wrestler" did it on film. Guys all together kind of milling around. Kasai being tended to by a fat white lady who is annoyed by having the camera around so much. He gets up when Justice Pain enters though and the two have a pleasant exchange while the white woman barks at Kasai to "get back here!" A huge blood puddle has pooled in the chair he was sitting in. Kasai's funny; the completely lost foreigner who gets shuttled around by people trying to clean him off. Trent Acid even helps dry his ragged back after they rinsed it in the shower. Finally the woman is applying some kind of liquid to Kasai's gaping elbow wound and tells the camera to cut. She's had enough and the DVD is finished.
Jun Kasai
Overall, this is one of my favorite wrestling DVDs just for the sheer novelty of it. It's small time, low budget and real injuries are the theme of the entire production. Alot of cringe worthy spots - and not from "I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY JUST DID THAT!" - more like "Oooh that kid almost killed himself". But it's a good look back at when some of these guys were just breaking in, and the progress (or forced retirement in the case of guys like Ric Blade) of their careers. The close, frenetic pacing of the cinematography almost lends a voyeuristic quality to the proceedings - like you're watching something you're not supposed to be seeing. This is compounded by the extra bonus backstage footage that literally brings you behind the magicians curtain, and the damage and repercussions of these types of matches are brutally apparent. All that plus Jun Kasai is the fucking shit. "Un FN Believable" gets a solid 2.5 grams out of 5 from your boy MSD.
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